It seems its been months yet again since I have updated anything on here. I guess for the last ten months or so I haven't felt the need to verbalise mythoughts and ideas. I was at a stage in my life where for the first time in a long while I knew what I wanted and the process that kept my thoughts so active and drenched in self exsposition were for a time, at rest.
In the last month or so I have been making my best attempts to bring my life to some sense of order and routine, Its a different approach to things and at times its a welcome change from the ever unpredictability and instablity that I always found myself in. Needless to say at points I do find myself crawling up the walls and asking if the routine way of living is really for me, It would seem that I found my own brand of stability and content in my orginal unpredictable way of living.Im finding a shit storm of anxiety and discontent pouring down over what I thought would help clear old discomforts and aches. This Leads me to ask the question, do I just enjoy living in this storm ive created?
I feel now as if the last 10 months of my life have been a huge blur, The thing that made me see the good in my surroundings and in a similair sense the good in myself, have since departed.Its a frustrating feeling that has left me ever the cynic I have been for years, unable to trust in the unknown. I was living as if I was in a key moment in my life, the moment where everything changes, problems resolve and negativity subsides for good. Looking back it would seem I was just infact apart of someone elses moment, a stop gap for someone in which they would learn more about themselves and how to better their own life and I guess in turn learn how to fix the troubles they had with people in their life when they met me. I was playing a supporting roles in a film I thought was my own. The special things that I held so dear cant help but seem tainted now. I always thought it might all end like this, but never wanted to believe it would.
The band have just about finished recording our brand new ep that we have been spending a long time on purely just to make sure we are totally happy with the final outcome, I'm finding myself itching to dive into band work and enjoying the inspiration that negativuty seems to bring out in me. This is just the beggining for Amy Can Flyy and I have never been more exited. Above is the video from our recent run of shows with the lovely dutch boys Only Seven Left. Enjoy.
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